I’ve been pondering on how to form my thoughts on Whitney and how the media has handled the news.As it still stands – per initial reports – her cause of death is unknown. As someone who is quasi-media I wish my fellow brethren and even those they invite to speak about Whitney can follow suit and just leave it at that; unknown. Speak solely on her legacy and the bright moments. Yet, because just like other iconic celebrities that have lived a VERY public life of good and bad, it’s expected that the messy drug past is brought to the surface. Still, it angers me that folks (especially in the age of social media) are QUICK to harp on the obvious whether it’s a past or present issue. It took everything within me not to respond to a comment that a dear friend and a member of the journalism industry posted about Whitney; asking “wasn’t she in the death pool anyway?” Instead, I counted to ten and watched comments like that float around Twitter and Facebook and wondered had it been Steven Tyler or any other known celeb that’s a hard core reveler would the treatment still be the same?
In recent times, within 24 hours of their deaths, folks put it out there that singers Amy Winehouse and Vesta Williams reverted back to drugs and overdosed. Clearly it wasn’t the case for neither one of them as it was later reported that Amy’s body basically went into shock or withdrawal as she was trying to sober up and Vesta had an enlarged heart. Both deaths, as with Whitney’s, was untimely. In theory, the untimeliness and its affect, we (the public and media) seek an immediate answer to their abrupt end. Because drugs was the obvious vice, we are quick to judge and make that the solution or cause of death without knowing all the facts. However, are we hurting the situation or are we holding the deceased accountable for their demise?
My mother has not long returned from church. She mentioned that our pastor made a small comment about Whitney’s death at the end of service. She missed the whole comment but she got a sense that folks had been talking to him about it and perhaps asking for his thoughts. She also sensed that his sentiments were that due to her years of substance abuse, ultimately “she did it to herself.” While there is some truth to this sentiment, as years of abuse can do a number of things to your body, is now the time to express it, especially when you don’t know all that was breaking down inside her body. And maybe… just maybe…. from the Christian perspective… while you do point fingers at years of drug abuse that poisoned her physical body… maybe just maybe…. this was God saying “your work is done. you seriously need to rest.” Maybe her body simply could not handle all that she was thought she was ready to embark on and sadly her time ended at the age of 48…. still very young.
I just wish there was a fair way to balance out the reports. Ok, so you want to state the obvious of her very public battle with drug abuse, but don’t let it over shadow the legacy of her career. I watched coverage last night on both MSNBC and CNN. I mainly stayed on MSNBC as they gave her “her flowers” or just due, until later on.. much later…someone brought up her past drug use. Yet, it didn’t seem to overshadow the good. CNN – as a Twitter bud put it – slaughtered Whitney’s image by focusing on the drug use. I didn’t stay with them for too long. It was too much negativity floating around. It was back to MSNBC for a while, until I switched to VH1 Soul where they immediately had a good hour or more of all Whitney Houston videos.
The real tragedy here consist of a few things. She leaves behind a teenage daughter. From here on out, Bobbi Kristina’s life has changed. When she gets older she’s going to have a story to tell and I can’t wait to hear it. Not for juicy details, but I wanna know her story of survival and how she managed to cope. The reports are coming out now that Bobbi has been hospitalized. She’s not handling this well at all. Her and Whitney were known to be EXTREMELY close, much like Whitney and her mother Cissy Houston. If anyone is a praying person, Bobbi should be lifted up and kept in prayer. Even Cissy, I’m sure is grieving heavily. There’s this belief that no parent should out live their children. I believe that. I would loose my shit if my daughter left this world while I’m still living. Even as a daughter I will still loose my shit when any of my parents leave this life. Friends of mine that have already lost parents or children. I’m learning that they never really get over it, but what gets them through is their faith. I admire their strength, even though some have admitted when the doors are closed and the room is empty they’ll have their spontaneous moment of grief, but they come out of it to face another day and push through the pain.
The other thing about this tragedy is our love for Whitney the diva with THE VOICE and the human being. Sentiments and kudos were thrown out on Twitter towards Clive Davis, Whitney’s mentor, friend and manager. People praised Clive for NEVER… I repeat NEVER giving up on Whitney. He worked with her through her good days and through her pain. As I told someone on Twitter last night, we all wanted that happy ending for Whitney. We wanted her to make this triumphant come back with all the projects she had lined up and completed. We wanted her to declare for the final time… drugs and other vices did not beat her, she beat it! As another Twitter bud put it, she was suppose to grow old well into her 70s and watch a tribute to her on VH1’s Diva’s Live. But those were our selfish wants for her and for us.
There are those that question why are so many people invested in this shocking news. Why are we crying over Whitney Houston, especially since we didn’t know her? I’m not gonna lie. I shed a few tears last night. It could have been my aunt that once battled substance abuse (her and Whitney are roughly the same age).
It could have been my mom who has heart issues and I hate it when she stresses herself to the max, especially as we are taking care of my grandmother. Her stress level(s) scare me.
I was shook to my core because Whitney was part of my childhood and like the rest of you I witnessed her life spill into the public… deep down I hoped for a better outcome. I was happy to see her glow, admit her faults and take responsibility during her two part one on one interview with Oprah. Of all the interviews I’ve seen of her, that was best as she peeled back layers and wanted so much more for herself, her daughter and out of life… and seemed to be working towards that.
As an old church mate of mine tweeted last night:
@MeganRSmith83: i didn’t have to know Whitney Houston to cry for her. i cry for the pain she was feeling – the happiness that somehow eluded her.
Poet and mental health awareness advocate Bassey Ikpi had this to say on Facebook:
“I’ve unfriended a few people for the tacky and tasteless status updates about how “Nobody mourns everyday people or What makes Whitney so special? or she was just a drug addict?”
I’ll tell you what: If you have moved through life unmoved by art in any form, then I mourn your inhumanity. I mourn the ice that forms your blood. I mourn the soul you traded for pretentiousness and superiority complex. I moun your inability to love something other than your hollow. I mourn whatever killed your empathy. We didnt know Whitney personally but she knew us. There are memories and stories that coat our skin and have her voice attached. That’s what art does. It is trans-formative and transcendent. It is the closest to magic that we can get on a daily basis.”
In the days to come, I’m sure an autopsy will be performed. Whatever the outcome of the cause, I pray it’s not a direct link to drugs. In the meantime, I’ll just reminisce about how one of my friends use to sing “I Wanna Run To You” over and over and over and over and over….. the time another friend of mine and I taped ourselves singing “The Greatest Love of All.” Also, the time when two other childhood friends visiting from California would come over to my grandparents house and we would play around in the basement. Once we re-enacted the “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” video. I just remember dressing up as mini Whitney Houtsons and Cyndi Laupers with pretend mics going “Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah I wanna dance with somebody!”
Wannna know something… I have so many favorite Whitney Houston songs.. but there’s a song that immediately came to mind last night as its opening lyrics brought me chills. Whitney’s “Your Love Is My Love” was written by Wyclef but those opening lyrics…. coupled with Bobbi in the background going “Sing mommy…” yeah…
“If tomorrow is Judgement Day and I’m standing on the front line, and the Lord asks me what I did with my life, I will say, I spent it with you.”
– Whitney Houston “Your Love Is My Love”
Posted in: regular
Mahoganie: Musings East of the Anacostia River 
dancingpalmtrees
February 12, 2012
You’ve said everything I’ve been feeling since last night. Where is the mercy, compassion, forgiveness in our hearts. Yes I too had to turn off CNN. As one of our EW sisters put it Marilyn Monroe and Elvis both died of drug overdoses and had substance abuse problems yet they are more loved and in Elvis case worshiped than when they were alive.
All have missed the mark. Even though I never meet Whitney and certainly did not know her on a personal level, I can relate to what she was going through. I’ve seen it within my own family but I did not throw them away. Also I feel for the young girl Bobbi Kristina. Losing a parent at any age is difficult but she’s only 18. She will need all the love and resources her family can give her. I believe she was released from the hospital. I remember I collapsed at my mother’s funeral and I was 39 at the time. Losing a parent is overwhelming.
I celebrate Whitney’s talent, her musical gifts, the joy her songs brought to so many. All of us have issues, problems, skeletons in the closet so to speak but until poor Whitney our lives are not under constant scrutiny like entertainers. If only the media and those of us who frequent social media like Facebook were as merciful as God. Whatever the cause of death still I believe God saw her pain and he said, Well Done thou good and faithful servant. Enter into the Joy of the Lord. Now she’s in her Heavenly Home.
mahoganie
February 12, 2012
Amen sis.. amen.
MrsTDJ
February 13, 2012
Great post! CNN’s coverage was too slanted for me, so I hit MTV Jams and VH1 Soul, where I was able to simply enjoy the beautiful woman with the anointed voice.